Decisions
by IanPhilippe
Summary: [LeeBryan, LeeRay, RayKai] Sequel to Too Late, could be a standalone... Ray lives with Kai and Lee, still in love with his best friend, is always there to comfort him. But what if one day, life turns upside down?
1. Chapter 1

**Decisions**

**Disclaimer:** I do not own Beyblade or characters used in this story. If I did, this would be an official manga instead of just fanfiction XD

**Warnings: **some language and of course – Yaoi… I'm thinking about writing mpreg (male pregnancy) and it might as well turn out to be a part of this story…

**Pairings:** Bryan/Lee, Kai/Ray, some others, mostly unrequited, may be mentioned

**A/N:** Characters might be a little OOC, well, maybe a lot, but I'll try my best not to do so. Any OOC-ness results in the fact that I haven't seen Beyblade anime, nor have I read the manga… my friend told me about Beyblade, I heard about it a million times, I watched a few episodes, I've read tons of fanfiction and became addicted to it…

I know I should be uploading my other story but now I have Beyblade period so... sorry, I will upload other things as well :)

**Chapter 1**

**Lee's POV**

It was a bit before the dawn when I woke up. Nothing unusual – I've always been a light sleeper and I didn't need that much time to feel refreshed. I stretched lazily on my bed, just because the warm sheets felt so good against my bare back, and with a loud yawn, I proceeded to the bathroom. Pretty much a usual morning, with cold shower waking me up completely and the soft humming of water boiling for my regular cup of tea.

I heard the rustling of keys in the lock and as it could be only one person, I continued my morning ritual with newspaper and jasmine oolong. One minute and hundred muttered curses later, I really saw a crouched figure creeping through the corridor. A glance at the alarm clock on the counter told me it was 6 AM, which in other words meant "way too early for Bryan to live". With a smile that played on my lips, I followed the grey-haired zombie, only to find him already collapsed on my bed, not even bothering with taking his boots off. I frowned a bit at the image of melting snow forming a wet stain on my clean sheets, but the amusement prevailed as he let out a pained groan muffled by my own pillow.

"What happened?" I asked, as it was rare for him to come here unannounced and even this early in the morning. He just growled and I had to wait a bit before I got the answer.

"They're renovating my house. Let me sleep… for a week. Or two."

I chuckled a bit as his groans broke into a string of insults directed to one certain person. I swear his landlord on the other end of Moscow must have been sneezing like crazy.

After a while it became obvious that he fell asleep again – it never took much for him to do so – and I decided to ignore his boots on my bed for this time. I would make him clean that up later, as he made it quite obvious that he was staying for a while, heh.

I managed not to stumble upon the big black rucksack lying on the floor, apparently packed in a hurry as half of the things were sticking out of it. Returning to my tea, I still had the image of his sleeping face in my mind, a face half buried in the pillow and deeply frowned upon the early hour. He was distinctively attractive even in this state, grumpy and anti-social and lacking sleep terribly. I couldn't kick him out even if I wanted to, and I definitely didn't.

After all, he had been a part of my life for – more or less – five years. It was quite a long time and we've come to know each other well during that time, but still, we were nothing more than friends. Fuck buddies, if you like – we had sex from time to time, but it was not lovemaking. We didn't share that passionate looks and hot kisses during the day, we didn't long to stay in each other's presence – it was more of tolerating each other and helping each other relieve our lust and need. It had always been enough for me as I was still in love with Ray and I somehow felt it was enough for Bryan because of the similar reason. I've never learned who his secret crush was and he never asked about mine, but somehow, we understood each other and this weird relationship was definitely better than being completely alone.

And… it gave Ray the necessary illusion of me being in a steady relationship, so he didn't have to worry about my feelings for him. I had no doubt he knew – he realized it that day when he and Kai had promised to each other that damned eternal love. It was kinda like a wedding, with Ray in his white kimono and Kai with his "official-and-not-affected" look, but his hands trembling. Ray was forever Kai's and even if I couldn't put up with that, I still remained his best friend, his shoulder to cry on when Kai said something too mean. It wasn't enough and still, it _was_, in the weirdest way possible. I knew it was the only way to stay by his side, so I even moved to Russia, the coldest and most unfriendly country I knew. Now, it wasn't so bad, when I grew accustomed and bought a lot of sweaters and jumpers, but still, I missed my sunny village from time to time. Sometimes, we even reminisced together with Ray, looking through all those old photos I couldn't help but bring with myself when I had been moving here, and I loved those times with hot chocolate and familiar faces with yellowish tinge to them.

I snapped back to reality and switched my laptop on – there was some work I had to do, even if I had to resist the sudden urge to return to that large, no longer empty bed and cuddle to the warm body – not that I would ever confess that to anyone.

When I finally managed to clear my head and started doing something useful, a loud knock echoed through the quiet flat. In a few seconds, a knock became a loud banging noise and until I managed to take those few steps from kitchen to doorway, the person on the other side already kicked my poor door a few times.

"What the hell do you…" I began angrily – no one was allowed to damage my property freely – but soon I fell silent as the amber eyes of the intruder glaring at me were furious and desperate at the same time.

"Can I stay here for a while?" Ray asked and I knew he's forcing his voice not to tremble. I had to force my own words to stay steady as my heart, as always, began to beat faster when I was near him.

"What's wrong?"

"Can I?!"

He looked absolutely lost, like a stray kitten – I knew how cliché it sounded and how painfully I would die if he knew I thought that – but his big, watery eyes looked exactly like that, a little neko lost in the snowstorm.

The snow reminded me of a certain someone and I frowned a bit:

"Something's wrong with Kai?"

As I spoke that name, those eyes started to well up with tears – and according to how reddened they already were, I figured that he had been crying a lot lately. Ray collapsed in my embrace and didn't even bother to suppress all those sobs and hiccups, soaking my sweat-shirt completely with his tears. Not that it mattered to me – it was kind of sadistic, but still I enjoyed times like these, when I could hold him tightly, feeling his warmth and softness, and it counted for comforting.

"I'm… I'm not sure anymore," he sobbed and clutched at my shirt, as I tried to step back a bit and close the door, so his almost hysterical shrieks wouldn't be heard in the whole house. After a while, I succeeded and his sobs turned even louder.

"Could I… stay here? Please…"

"Sure," I said, unable to tell him anything more constructive, as I caressed his soft black hair – damn, it smelled so good even now – and tried to comfort him.

"Thanks… because I'm… not sure," he repeated again and again, still getting louder, and though my shirt muffled his shaking voice a bit, it obviously wasn't enough, as behind my back, I heard footsteps and when I turned, a familiar voice echoed, deep and a bit husky from sleep:

"I wonder why you're making so much noise," Bryan yawned and leaned against the wall, still too drowsy and unfocused. Somehow, even in his slumber he must have realized just how warm my flat was, and shed a few layers of clothing – in fact, shed everything except his boxers and socks, which apparently remained on their respective place only because of his laziness. His hair was messy and he looked strangely adorable – well, another word I would be killed for, if that person knew. But still, he somehow matched that place quite well, the bed visible behind his back, the wall he was leaning against, even the vase he almost knocked down from the coffee table. This whole place, a place in my life, suited him so much that even I was left with mouth wide open.

"Oh… hi, Ray," he waved and with another massive yawn, he proceeded to the kitchen for his morning dose of caffeine. He looked as if he had been doing it this way for years and when I finally managed to turn to Ray, I found him with his jaw fallen somewhere to the ground and there was even more colour to his cheeks, previously blushed only from his weeping.

"Uh..." Ray stepped back from my hug – I didn't even realize my arms were still on his shoulders – and coughed uncomfortably.

"I… I'm sorry, Lee… if I knew… I wouldn't have asked to stay here… uh…"

I was paralyzed to the point of being unable to come up with some accurate excuse. I always told Ray that it was nothing too serious between me and Bryan, always leaving the back door open if Ray decided he didn't like Kai anymore… though I knew it was hopeless. And now, when the chance finally came (I knew it was horrible of me to think this way about my friend's misfortune, but I couldn't help myself)… now it looked like me and Bryan, who in fact wasn't even my boyfriend, moved together.

And maybe I would be able to say something poor and explaining, if said not-even-boyfriend hadn't been half asleep and if he hadn't considered it a great idea to hug me from behind and kiss my neck passionately. I wasn't able to resist – he was a good kisser and before all, he caught me off-guard, so my eyes fell closed on their own – and when he pulled back after only a few seconds, he smiled at poor, shocked Ray too nicely to be true:

"Feel free to stay. The guest room is on the other end of the flat, so you won't be disturbed…"

He left that sentence unfinished, but still, it spoke volumes and I didn't even have the strength to look at Ray. I was too shocked myself.

**TBC...**

Liked? Disliked? Why? Tell me :)


	2. Chapter 2

Ice-wolf-16: Yup, I think so too, Bryan is absolutely loveable, mwahaha :)

Sa-kun: Thanks :) I don't think Rei is a crybaby either, but well, everyone cries sometimes and Lee is his best friend. And where would you cry if not on your best friend's shoulder:) That's what I thought...

Thanks for the review and hug to you, hope I won't disappoint you XD Now, on with the nect chapter...**  
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**Chapter 2**

**Bryan's POV**

I've always thought I was unable to love and most probably I was right. I've never had any romantic feelings for anyone: there were only those whom I wanted – and usually had – and those whom I didn't want at all. If the person was completely out of my reach, I never felt frustrated or unhappy – another interesting one appeared shortly and I was always good with forgetting.

I always thought there was no one destined for me and I didn't mind it that much – in fact, those short relationships I've had only annoyed me, as the person always wanted more than I could give. The first time I realized something's wrong was when finally all of my friends got seriously involved with someone and being alone started to feel really awkward. I hated being a fifth wheel, though I never thought that it would change someday.

In spite of my predictions, it changed in the most unexpected time. I was invited to Kai's pseudo-wedding and, with the thoughts about crazy people and serious involvements, I went, though it was the very least thing I wanted to do. I never liked real weddings too much and I highly doubted the possibility of liking the fake ones.

Just as I thought, there were many people, mostly bladers whom I knew, dressed in formal and acting terribly ceremonious. From the beginning I was searching for an opportunity to get my ass out of there, so when Ray, dressed in a weird white piece of cloth, asked me to find and fetch his friend from China, I grasped the chance and got lost.

Said friend was in the back room, sitting there alone and generally trying his best to look as pitiful as possible. I've always despised that type of a man who would endlessly complain, cry and act overly-emotional (maybe that's why I've never liked Ray), so I felt no desire to talk to him more than necessary.

"Ray's calling you."

"Tell him I'm not feeling well," he said, his voice a bit hoarse and I assumed he must have been crying. _Damn these sensitive morons. If he expects some words of sympathy from me, he's terribly wrong._

"I'm not a courier."

"Then why the hell are you here?" he growled and something in him really made my eye twitch. There were only few people who could absolutely piss me off in less than two seconds, but he was obviously one of them.

"Believe me, I don't desire your company," I managed to take the word _sarcasm_ to a higher level, "I'm here only because your incompetent neko-friend told me to fetch you."

I expected him to pout, to scowl, and even to yell at me. What I did not expect was being suddenly pushed, or more like thrown against a wall behind my back, with his hands clutching at my collar and uncomfortably shortening my supply of oxygen.

Considering that he was one head shorter than me, it was all even more impressive.

_Could you be different from what I thought you were?_ I asked somewhere in my mind, but I was still too shocked by his reaction to really comprehend my own thoughts.

"Any of my _neko-friends_ could kick your frozen Russian ass anytime you want," he hissed in my face and having his bare feline fangs too close to my throat, I realized that he managed to look threatening even with his height and those red, teary eyes. What astounded me even more was the fact that it wasn't Ray whom he was defending: it was his patriotism what I had challenged and to what he responded. I poked his personal pride and now, when he accepted my game, it was once again my turn.

But before I could react, he released me and strode away. That stirring feeling deep inside me returned, even more insistent than before. He was annoying and obnoxious and that feeling urged me to show him his place. Damn, how did he dare to treat me the way no one else had treated me before?

However, he caught my eye that evening. I couldn't turn my attention away from him for the rest of the reception and his obvious ignorance of my person just annoyed me further. He was cheerful, he was nice and polite and he laughed with Ray and Kai over something asinine many times during those painfully long hours. I never learned whether it was his intention or if he thoroughly fascinated me without being aware of it at all, but since that night, I knew I _had_ to have him.

And when I pushed him against that wall at three in the morning and kissed him, he almost knocked my teeth out with such a sheer brutality I would never expect from someone as smashed beyond all recognition as he was.

When he stumbled down that road towards his taxi, I smiled (and hissed, when my split lip announced its presence): _I'll have you, Lee Wong. One day, you'll be mine. _

---

So, you can pretty much understand my annoyance, when I finally _have_ him within my reach, and at that very moment, someone else appears and interferes.

And when that someone is the very person I can't stand in the same room with me, it only adds to my starting headache.

Ray is embodiment of all human traits I hate from the bottom of my heart and when I take the fact Lee never stopped loving him into consideration, I feel the rising urge to strangle the damned neko-jin with his own ridiculously long hair.

Don't misunderstand me – I'm not jealous or anything, because I don't really _love_ Lee. I'm incapable of things like that. I just have this horrible personality and possessiveness issues.

And Lee is _mine_, absolutely, totally, utterly mine. It took me painfully long time to convince and manoeuvre him into this weird relationship we have now, and because of that: _I won't give him up to the likes of you, Ray Kon. You can read it from my demoniac smile, from challenge in my eyes as I kiss him right in front of your horrified face, can't you?_

_Try to take him if you dare, Ray Kon. _

_Because I won't let you. _

**To be continued...**


	3. Chapter 3

**A/N:** Sorry for the delay, I kinda forgot to upload XD But anyway, something is finally happening in this chapter and the next one will even better, I promise. Next upload will be soon if you review properly XD because the next two chapters are done already. Have fun and let me know if you liked it.**  
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**Chapter 3**

**Lee's POV**

I have never really wondered about the effect of too much adrenaline on a human body, but I was pretty much aware of the fact that I was experiencing that situation now.

Now, when I've just pulled my... no, Bryan into the bedroom that we were supposed to share for some time. At least according to what happened only seconds ago.

"Where the hell did you get that idea?" I yelled at him and his indifference made my blood boil. Damn, how can he act as if nothing happened?

"I thought you used us as a steady-relationship cover," he scratched his head and yawned. I couldn't decide whether he was still sleepy or just trying to annoy me further, so my anger decided for me for the latter.

"That's not the point! Why did you say that?"

"Don't you want him to stay?"

"That's not it," I frowned and from his cold smirk, it was quite obvious that he knew what I was thinking. And there was never anything I hated more than having my thoughts and moves read - maybe that's why he had always been so damn good with it.

"So should I, your so-called boyfriend, sleep in a guest room? And let you sleep with him?"

He was being ironic, which meant something was pissing him off, but I wasn't really in a state to care. In fact, his biting words just ticked me off more. And combined with the embarrassment somehow forming in me under his inquisitive glare, it was an explosive mixture.

"I'm just asking why you had to act like that in front of him!"

"And I'm asking why the hell you mind so much."

"You know! And that's why it pisses me off, because you did it purposely!"

"Hey, I'm not a scheming bitch."

"Yes you are! You know that I care for him and yet you still did that!" I started pacing the room restlessly - it was the habit I couldn't get rid of no matter what, the habit that always showed itself when I was stressed, anxious or just angry. And now, I was all of the mentioned and even more - Bryan had always had this weird quality of getting on my nerves and that was one of the main points why we never tried living together. Not that we would, anyway.

Weird thoughts spun inside my head as I strode towards the window and back again without realizing the motion. And he still managed to look so damn calm and composed - that was another thing I hated about him. Not always, but at the times like this, when we were arguing about something and it felt as if I was arguing with myself, as if he wasn't even involved. He always made it clear that he wasn't, so why did he act this way now? Why?!

"What did you expect from me, Lee? To leave anytime he shows a slightest bit of interest and give you my blessing?!"

"Why not? You just sleep with me whenever you want it," I spat in his face even if I was aware of the fact that it was the way our relationship worked. One of us, or maybe both, wanted sex and received it - that was all. But somehow, it felt like a good point to make. A good line to draw.

He wasn't as understanding as I hoped he would be. But on the other side, he was never one to care about others - maybe that was why it always felt safe with him, because there wasn't a possibility of him growing attached to me. And he seemed to choose me for the same reason, because I wasn't demanding and didn't cling to him all the time... so just WHY the hell does he have to change?

"So I'm the bad one now? Remember that you're the one who stays with his fuck buddy for years just because he's unable to move on from his unrequited love," he retorted back, and though still calm, his voice held a threatening tone. Stop it, it said, before I'm forced to...

To do what? I silently challenged that threat with my own words, though subconsciously:

"You never even loved anyone, me included, so shut the hell up!"

"No, I don't love you and don't you dare pretend that you care, because I heard you whisper his name when we had sex several times."

The audible accusation left me with mouth wide open. As I stood there, suddenly motionless and thoroughly shocked, I couldn't think of anything to say. I wasn't really aware of that, I never really intentionally thought about Ray during the times with Bryan and I didn't know how to respond to it.

"When..." I started, already quiet, but he just dismissed me with a wave of his hand, collecting his jumper and jeans from under the bed.

"Forget it."

With that, he left and after a few minutes I heard the slamming of the front door.

I didn't really feel like facing Ray at the moment, but it had to be done eventually so after trying to sort out my thoughts for a while (and completely failing), I stepped out of my room and prayed that Ray would have the decency to stay in his room or at least act as if nothing happened.

He did neither and I bumped into him in the kitchen, his amber eyes pinning me down and inquiring about what was wrong.

"I don't want to discuss it," I sighed and accepted a cup of a tea. I never really liked this strong, black tea Ray favoured, but it was better than nothing and also, it offered me something to do with my hands.

"Really?" he asked and I noticed that despite his tired eyes, he looked a lot better than when he came.

"Really," I smiled and sipped from my cup. The taste was a bit unusual, but it took only a bit of imagination about how the Ray's mouth had to taste similar and the tea became a lot tastier in my opinion. But still, as I thought about that, the memory of Bryan's last remark showed up and bugged me restlessly and a bitter taste of guilt mixed with the black tea. I was suddenly too tired to consider that feeling seriously. And so, instead of that I focused on meddling in other people's business.

"What 'bout you, Ray? What happened between you two?"

His sour grimace was speaking volumes and he took his time sipping his own tea.

"Has he done something...?"

"No," the black hair loosened from his ponytail went flying around his face as he shook his head in denial, "it's not really his fault. It's just... well, after all these years I suddenly don't feel that undying love and I think it's the same for him. That's why I said I'm not sure anymore."

"Isn't that what happens all the time?"

"Is it...?" his eyes felt strangely distant for a second and I thought it got to him more than he was able to accept. I really thought it was common - the passionate love disappears and only habits stay after some time, but I didn't want Ray to be unhappy. Yes, I waited and hoped for my chance for all these years, but if the price was his happiness, I wasn't willing to pay it. And the mere thought that I had supported him since he and Kai decided to go steady and now Ray just can't be sure... somehow, that idea was frustrating in a way I couldn't quite comprehend. Maybe it was just usual and normal sympathy for the best friend, that itching we feel when our loved ones suffer.

"Stay as long as you want," I smiled at him with what I hoped was a reassuring smile and he returned it, though still full of that dreamy quality. With that, he really retreated to his current room and I had finally enough peace to finish my work.

Unfortunately I just wasn't able to focus.


	4. Chapter 4

**Chapter 4**

**Bryan's POV**

Slamming the door usually helped. Now I just found myself irritated even further at the loud sound and a disagreeing grimace of some old neighbour.

The worst part was that I didn't even have the right to be angry. Every word he said was true and I agreed to that long years ago... but still these thoughts didn't calm me one bit as I strode through the freezing and hostile Moscow night. This city was a fairy-tale during the day, but after the sunset, the magic always changed to a nightmare. At least it always seemed so to me when I was a kid, and even now I felt the aggression of empty streets leading me to the only one person I could take my anger out on without the possibility of him smashing my face. Not that I cared that much...

But especially now, it had to be him. Maybe this time he could do more than listening to my rambling, getting pissed beyond all recognition with me and sending me home later.

It took a while to reach him as his bodyguards didn't seem to be keen on letting me in. It wasn't that surprising – if I was them, I wouldn't let myself in either. Finally my saviour appeared with a cynical grin as always and told them not to disturb us.

The horrid size of Hiwatari mansion never ceased to disturb me. Too big, too offensive, built only to show off the family's wealth. Kai ignored all that, though that ignorance was too perfect to be true. I never really understood why he had to move in to the house that held his worst memories, but now wasn't the time to discuss this. In fact, I gave up on Kai and this house long ago.

"What it is that brings you here?" Kai asked, handing me a glass of amber liquid.

"I want you to take your damned cat back," I growled when I downed the offered liquor, expecting some retort about minding my own business.

Instead, he just raised an eyebrow at me, clearly expecting some explanation. Not that I didn't want to explain, but I wasn't too sure of my motives myself and even if I had a vague idea of what was pissing me off the most, it was damn hard to voice it.

"Just take him back, OK..." I sighed and followed his gesture, motioning me to seat myself.

"You make it sound as if I threw him out into the snowstorm."

"You threw _me_ into the snowstorm."

"How pathetic," he smirked and I noticed how he still seemed out of place in that luxurious armchair, in front of the fireplace and with a glass of whiskey in his hand.

"Nevermind that. Just take your beloved Ray back and let me live peacefully."

"Hey... what happened?" a soft tone sneaked into his voice as he eyed me suspiciously, obviously noticing the sarcasm in my voice, biting even more than usual.

"He showed up in the morning and said that he needed to spend some time there."

"Where?"

"Lee's flat."

"And what were you doing there?"

Amusement in his tone just made my adrenaline rise once more.

"Very funny. I do not know what you and Ray usually do, but we..."

"Yeah. Considering the fact that you confirmed on many occasions that there was no _we_, it's very funny indeed."

I glared at him, hoping that it would speak volumes to him and make him stop that frontal attack on my nerves. I didn't need that now.

"My apartment is being repaired. And I needed some place to stay so I went to Lee's..."

"Hoping for some time alone, I assume."

"Stop assuming and listen, OK?"

His hands flew to the air in defensive gesture and he nodded, though still with a smirk on his face.

"So, _your_ lover showed up, _my_ lover..."

"Fuck buddy."

"Would you please stop being a git and listen, or do I have to consider everything carefully before I speak so you won't argue over every little word?"

"I love you when you're this stressed out. And I love Lee when he does this to you."

"You're supposed to be my friend," I sighed, looking at his beaming smirk, just as fake as his composure. He couldn't fool me; I knew him long enough to see the almost nonexistent tremor in his hands and carefully masked dark circles under his eyes.

The worst part was that I couldn't fool him either.

"I don't really know why you have to play this stupid game, both you and him," he raised his hand to shut me up before I could complain, "but you're obviously jealous."

"I'm not."

"Are too."

"Am not... look, I'm not gonna argue with you as if I was five. I came to tell you to take Ray back or kill him, doesn't matter to me. Just remove him from my sight."

"I'm not his guardian. He's old enough to take care of himself and if he wants to stay with Lee for now..."

"But..."

"Shut up, Bry," he whispered pleadingly and his almost lifeless eyes reflected the dancing of fire. I finally noticed how down he really looked – something was wrong and it wasn't just a stupid usual quarrel.

"What's up with you two?" I asked when the silence became too obvious for my liking and he grew even more distant in his staring into the fire.

A mere shrug told me nothing – only that it was just as bad as I imagined.

"Bry... remember how you told me that eternal love is bullshit and only idiots believe in it?"

"Yeah. You smiled exactly like an idiot then and Ray growled at me. I would swear he was just a step away from biting me."

"I'm starting to think that you were right."

I suddenly felt something heavy in my chest, as if my heart decided to take a lunch break, and I was left staring at him with mouth wide open. That didn't happen often, but he was one of the few people who could still surprise me. However, I could very well live without _this_ surprise – I remembered all those times I called him a naive idiot for believing in real love, and I remembered how happy he looked when he frowned at me and told me that I just hadn't found the right person yet.

I always believed him somewhere deep down in my mind. I always argued and said the same things, only to be assured by his words and that unknown emotion showing in his every gesture when Ray was near. I never liked Ray, but I appreciated what he had done for Kai and I forced myself to be at least a bit sociable because of Kai. I always believed in Kai's words because of them – seeing them happy for all those years made something deep inside me warm and wanting.

That same something seemed empty and cold all of a sudden now as I watched Kai's motionless figure gazing into the fire. Could it be that I was right...?

"No," I growled, more for myself, but Kai looked at me, the ghosts of things he thought he had lost still in his eyes. He seemed so helpless and lonely in that split second, and I knew what I had to say. What I had to say and _think_ to save his and my own sanity.

"I wasn't right, I never was. You're really losing your mind if you think that _I_ was right in something regarding relations with people."

"I am. And I don't know how to prevent myself from really losing it," he sighed, trembling fingers running trough his two-toned hair.

"Go speak to him. I'm sure he'll come back."

"That's what's worst about it, Bry," his eyes feverishly shone in the dark and I barely managed a poker face. When he had this quietly insane expression, it always scared the hell out of me.

"What is...?"

"I'm not sure if I want him back. And I want to want him... I'm speaking bullshit again," a faint smile crossed his lips, even more creepy than his look.

I left without a word. Something deep inside me was screaming and clenching its teeth and I suddenly just wanted to kick something. I practically pleaded for it when strolling through all the darkest alleys, but no one worthy appeared and my need to beat someone up just welled inside me, roaring like a waterfall and unable to calm down.

Lazy evil of another Moscow night didn't answer my raging thoughts and I was once again left alone with an emotional mess I just couldn't deal with.


End file.
